<p><b><h5>What if the thing you most wanted feels nothing like you expected?</b><br><b>A <i>Grazia </i>Hot Debut</h5></b><br><b><br>''A richly textured novel showing the push and pull of motherhood, career identity and what it means to be a woman with multiple sides ... I was absolutely glued to it'' Emma Gannon, bestselling author of <i>Olive</i><br></b><br>After five exhilarating years in New York, Stevie has a successful career and a glamorous social life. But what she most wants is a baby, an aspiration that feels impossible given that she is single, thirty-eight and living in a tiny apartment in Manhattan, far away from most of her family in England.<br><br>Determined to become a mother, Stevie returns to London and has a baby on her own. When she gives birth to Ash, she finds motherhood painfully at odds with her former life and her expectations. She begins to wonder if having a child was a mistake - and what she might be willing to do to escape. As she struggles with what her fu